Inspiration (Getting It Back)

Inspiration can either suffer or prosper in the light of freedom. This is something we’ve all felt as seniors, even though we’ve just gotten halfway through our very last year of schooling as we know it. For me, though, I’ve felt both, and it’s absolutely torture! Sometimes, I feel I want to give the world my ideas, just like I thought it’d be a good idea to incorporate historical ideas of power in the essay I wrote with Angie for our midterm paper. I’ve always thought history was interesting because of its long-term influence on how we think as a society, but none of it talks about senioritis! 

Don’t get me wrong–I’ve had my fair share of trouble these past few months, and it’s most certainly affected my motivation in the classroom. Not all of it was senioritis, and to all the hardworking seniors in this class, I’m sure you know this, too. Sometimes, it’s hard to use the brightening light of free will to improve yourself intellectually and work-ethic-wise. Sometimes, it’s easiest to use it as a dam that keeps all the trouble away, whatever it may be.

Climbing back up, though, well… of course it’s an uphill battle. Doesn’t help when you get into the college you wanted to go to–or when you don’t. Really, though, when reading The Art of War and “The Prince”, two of the most well-known historical writings about power, I thought, Wow, this really is interesting but kind of boring to read at the same time. The ideas kept me going. Knowing more about the great minds before us figuring out how man timelessly interacts with one another is fulfilling. I wanted to keep chasing that fulfillment, so I ended up getting a lot closer to getting out of my own slump.

That’s the kind of thinking that’s gonna let me enjoy school more, so I’m going to try and take that outlook and apply it wherever I can. Math, too. Somehow. I know that once I find the interesting parts in the parts of my life I find most challenging, I can make my days more enjoyable everywhere. After years of dreading reading on my own time, maybe I really will meet my past goal of reading more this year–all because of books and people that existed long before my time.